Thursday, 27 September 2012

President Fred clings on! Part 1

This was a game set in the well-known fictional African country of Ph'tang.  The newly elected President Fred was inroduced in a previous post, and this game covered his efforts to cling to power in the face of hostile factions and (most dangerous of all?) his own bodyguard.
Roles, (with those who played them and why) were as folows:
President Fred (Steve T - he likes to wear a big hat)
You are the democratically elected and benign ruler of the small African state of Ph’tang, your party P.O.N.G. (the Ph’tangi Organisation for National Glorification) having swept to victory at the last election. Under your direct command is your devoted (and well remunerated) bodyguard, The Purple Helmets. You also have at your service a loyal unit of the Ph’tangi Army, namely F.R.O.L.I.C. under the command of your loyal but sinister subordinate Captain De'ath.
  1. Survive and cling to power.
  2. Obtain the approval of the international community, especially the UN.
  3. Display the exaggerated mannerisms of a comedy dictator.
Captain De'ath (Wg Cdr Luddite - he is rather sinister)
You are the loyal and trusted sidekick to the recently re-elected President Fred of Ph’tang. You command F.R.O.L.I.C. (Fanatic Regiment Of Light Infantry Cowards).
  1. Ensure that President Fred stays in power – if he goes so do you!
  2. Advance your career…
  3. Avoid heavy casualties in your own force.
  4. Act the part of a shadowy henchman.
Colonel Incognito (Dave S - he has the beard for it)
You are the Cuban ‘adviser’ to and thus de facto commander of L.A.D.A. (the Leftist Army of Darkest Africa). Having assembled your forces in nearby Zoone, the time is now right to invade Ph’tang in the interests of peace and stability. You have instructed the local revolutionaries to take action, and it is better that they sustain the casualties, rather than losing your expensively trained regulars…
  1. Depose the fascist President Fred.
  2. Obtain UN approval for your actions.
  3. Avoid heavy casualties in your own force.
  4. Act the part of the glassy-eyed Communist fanatic.
Dave (or 'Fidel') shows his concern for civillian casualties.
The Limp Wrist (Martin R - he was once seen reading the Guardian)
You are the shadowy and mysterious leader of a popular uprising against the evil and repressive dictatorship of President Fred.  Your organisation, The Peoples Organisation For Socialism is covertly backed by the Cuban sponsored Leftist Army of Darkest Africa (L.A.D.A.) which is massing on the border prior to invading Ph’tang. Now is the time for action!
  1. Overthrow the president.
  2. Obtain UN assisstance.
  3. Acquire legitimacy in the eyes of the world.
  4. Act in a rather camp fashion. 
Martin closes his eyes to the excesses of the revolution.
The table (6x4 feet) was set up with a small town, woods, hills, the presidential compound, barracks and a river marking the border with neighbouring Zoone. 
 As well as very basic 'rules' governing movement and firing, the main mechanism of the game was the Matrix Argument.  For those of you unfamiliar with such things, have a look at the appropriate page of the WD website.


Wg Cdr Luddite said...

"rather sinister", best description of me ever.

Tim Gow said...

Wg Cdr Luddite
I did have a longer description, but after I'd deleted all the really offensive words there wasn't much left...

Trebian said...

The spirit of President Jog-Jog lives on.

Tim Gow said...

Fred had quite an easy time of it - unlike his two previous outings this one didn't produce any assassination attempts....

mad padre said...

I am pretty sure I saw Pres. Fred on Telly speaking at the UN yesterday. Something about western imperialists and please send cash.. :).

Tim Gow said...

Mad Padre
That certainly sounds like Fred. Especially the bit about cash.

Stephen Thomas said...

A Terrible Tragedy.

Well a lotta de dust settlin, not to mention de earf, an it time fo me to answer all de loyal fans wot bin askin “when we getting de true story about de fearful coo?”

Well , natcherly de worl press getting it wrong, jus de way they getting everyting wrong about Ph’tang. Dey all upset on account o it being so unbearable seeing my humble self turning central Africa into de Utopian paradise, everyone hopin I getin de chop an provin de filthy inwendo in de discutin left wing press.

In fac, de whole ting been a pussonal tragedy while showin dat de faith o de loyal subberjects in Ph’tang never bin stronger, all sorts o people queuing up to lay down de life in de great cause. Fust I hearing o de sitwation is where I getting a phone call f’om a pussonal frien informin me dat de leader of de Puffs, my good frien Martin Umbopu bin down de shops an buyin a box o de .45 ammunition. Dis alone not a cause fo concern but when dis frien tellin me he heard where Martin bin makin de wills, seein lawyers, givin away de shrunk head collection, an sim’lar, it occurin to me dat Martin havin some pussonal problems.

In consequence I poppin into de nearest vehicle, wot happen to be de famous Chieftain tank, an I setting off in top gear. Lotta other tanks following me by mistake on account o everyone thinking it some kine o initiative test. Anyway, I pullin up outside o Martins place , an burstin into de room, an wot I see but Martin wid de han’tooled Webberley in de mouf.
“What you doin you mad bugger?” I cryin out.
“I endin it all”shoutin Martin. “I bin havin it away wid dat big bird wot work on de chip counter at Mcdonalds. Wot kind o behavior you callin dat for a political leader?”
“It jus a human weakness, darling Martin” I yelling, “I forgive you on de spot.”
But too late! Befor I able to stop him, dis close pussonal frien shootin hisself in de mouf six times!

An believing a coo to be under way, de fanatical loyal followers all rushin out onto de road to save de beloved president f’om whoever doin de shootin. When de equally loyal tank crews see all dese people runnin about waving de ordnance, dey natcherly opening up wid all available armament.

It takin three days to sort out de confusion, durin which time de entire Puff party gittin accidentally wiped out, also buried quick on account o de flies etcetera. De great tragedy is no one being lef to tell de tale, one or two o de wounded proppin themselves up when they see me commin, but befo dey able to speak, de accidental ricochets whangin off de trees an blowin de backs o de bonces out.

We gonna institute a day o “National Mourning” fo de tragedy, soon as de accidental shootin easin up a bit.

Pres Fred.

Martin Rapier said...

Meanwhile, back in the real world the heroic guerilla fighters of P.O.O.F. merely melt back into the countryside taking their weapons and all those supplies donated by the UN with them.

The mad dictator can be left to rave in his cholera ridden capital filled with decomposing corpses and to contemplate the darkness in his soul.

Archduke Piccolo said...

Was that meant to be the People's Own Organization For Socialism...? Just asking...

Tim Gow said...

Stephen Thomas
And I've not even posted the game report yet!

Tim Gow said...

Martin Rapier
That's your name down for Tourism Minister!

Tim Gow said...

Archduke Piccolo
the People's Own? Splitters.